Like come on, this is ruining the game, flames are ok, these other random floppy hairs and huge random 3d objects are pushing it a bit too far. Don't you think?

You can just turn them off you know.

They have a whole system set up for this, I am not too sure if they would remove them.

They really aren't huge floppy or all too distracting. The only pretty bad 3d item are the Kickin' Kicks, which if not loaded properly can cause no feet to show on the player. And as said, you can turn them off just like distracting flames.

Still, it just really changes the whole style of the game and makes it too... hipsterish.

Keep the game classic

I'm sure you know what classic tb is.
It doesn't change any gameplay mechanisms or style; it adds new levels of customization and opens up an entire new market section that can be further expanded on with tourneys and stuff.

Let's get rid of all customization while we're at it, that seems completely reasonable.

Did you catch the sarcasm?

It's optional, you can turn it off. Let those who wish to lose look at something pretty while doing so.

The very nature of Toribash is to have limitless customization. Moves can be so custom and unique to each person, Textures and color and joint combinations make you look as unbelievable different from the next person.

3D Objects and Hairs are just another way to add to that customization. And like any good feature we have: they are completely toggable. There's no reason to remove a toggable feature.

I'm sure the devs made an off button for everything that annoys players visually more or less