At least I can eat, it's not great from time to time, but it's alright.
The only thing that really profoundly disturbs me is going outside, specially at night, at day I can handle it. This society I live in is savage, at best, animalistic at worst.
I do feel fear. I feel a lot of fear, a mountain of fear, whenever regular things happen, my entire country has been Pavlov-trained to have near heart attacks whenever we hear or see some guy by himself on a motorcycle getting a bit too close, or whenever our car turns off randomly in the middle of the street due to shitty maintenance with shitty repair parts because there are no original pieces, or whenever we see some civil guards stopping a truck carrying goods. It is all fucked, really.
I'm personally alright, but it is getting harder, and without even the beginning of a premise of a future in this country, the first step towards planning something is getting out, universities barely function, there are 0 opportunities and 0 ways to get ahead unless you are a spineless scammer or killer, we are looking more and more like those seemingly dystopic and insane north African countries that I used to watch documentaries about, the ones we've all watched by vice, the thing we're missing is probably cannibals in the armed forces, but I wouldn't be surprised when the day comes that that is also a match.
By now it is the fleeting hope of leaving that keeps people up, the country won't change, certainly not soon. The people won't change, not until some generations pass, the people have been incredibly manipulated and mentally coerced towards a communist entitled mentality, the poor deserve everything, doing nothing, and riot if it's not given to them. The rich deserve death, and the middle class is squeezed to non existence.
Do you know how much we pay for basic services? water, electricity, and gas, the ones that are also always being cut, we just had a 30 minute blackout while we were having lunch, and my family thanked god because it was so short. Like a week ago we had 8 hour ones, day after day. We pay under a dollar, for all of them, every like 6 months or something, it's absolutely insane how fucking dense people have to be to be asking quality off of that. If they were smart, they'd riot to have the prices up so maintenance can be done, but alas, the government subdues the peasants (and that's quoting them, they call them pueblo, which means town, but as in not a city, but a town, it's almost derogatory and it's meant to target specifically lower classes) with the free services.
One of these days I'll make a detailed post demystifying the crooked political system, as the opposition has been working hand in hand with the government for over 10 years to give glimpses of hope to most of the people, only for it to be heartlessly taken away because the heroes and martyrs of the people (Manuel Rosales, Capriles Radonski, Juan Guaidó) have been bought. I'll say it again, it's fucked.
