Well it is hard to say without seeing your actual hand, but I would say that proportions are not quite right. But this is why we practice isn't it. With careful observation of both the subject matter and your own art concious improvement is made.
Your editing work is spot on, I don't see at all where the title once was. I do notice some aberrations to the right of Atlas above the mountain though.
@LedRay looking great, iAwesome's tip about dropper blending is legit too. Paint your highlights and shadows with color (in concept art - which is similar style to yours tbh which is cool - typical hl/shadows is something like yellow/red light and purple/blue shadows) instead of with white/black. If you paint them at like 50% or whatever then you can dropper blend to get the gradient you want, and it ends up with a very soft, organic feeling (yes, even on hardsurfaces IMO, but it looks 1000x better than gradient shading).